Cupid's Crosshairs

Today, we're stepping away from heroes and super-villains and taking a nice jaunt into the world of romance and Hallmark-style relationships.

There is much to be said about fiction. Sometimes, the relationships are so painfully real it's hard to read or hear. Sometimes, they're so cloyingly adorable and sweet that a trip to the dentist is required. And sometimes, they're just plain unrealistic. Sometimes, they create false standards. Sometimes, they just aren't healthy. 

Today's field trip into the land of tropes includes a visit to something I like to call "insta-love".

You know, the one where a female lead happens to be in some artsy-fartsy cafe and she looks up and sees her perfect man staring at her from across the room. Their eyes meet, fireworks explode, Cupid shoots and audiences everywhere "aww". 

I have two problems with this situation. One; artsy-fartsy cafes tend to smell funny and are as such strenuously avoided. Two; is the heroine a mind-reader? As far as I can tell, most of us aren't blessed with the ability to read someone on sight. Even Cal Lightman¹, based on real-life Dr. Paul Ekman, isn't that good. 

Oh, Bella. Why, oh why?

Instant-attraction? Sure. Instant connection over the book they both happen to be reading? Sure. But insta-love? Maybe not. It's impossible to know the subtleties of character a person has without first talking to them. It's even harder to know if two people are compatible if the most interaction they've had is a shared glance.

There's a reason the "best-friends who fall in love" trope works - it's because at the very least, they've taken the time to actually to get to know one another. Sure, it's cliched and played out and usually involves griping about how "they'll never see you like I do", but at the very least, there can be a modicrum of reality.
That's not to say you, as the creator of the next great romance, can't have your characters share glances across a crowded room. They can be attracted to one another, and maybe even trade hopeful smiles. Just be cognisant that love isn't instant. It takes work and time. Don't force your characters into relationships just for the sake of having relationships.

Your characters should be flawed, imperfect and most of all, relatable. Not every relationship will end with two souls harmonizing. Some break and fall
apart. What appears lovely at first glance might turn out to be horrendous - don't limit yourself to happily-ever-afters.
Even your characters need to learn how to be alone and to deal with heartbreak - it's what allows them to be even more real.

And most of all; realize that Cupid doesn't always have the best aim.

---

1 Dr Cal Lightman is played by Tim Roth in the wonderful TV show "Lie to Me". Lightman plays a fictionalized version of Dr. Ekman, a man capable of reading micro-expressions. It's a solid piece of television, if you're looking for a new Netflix show to binge on. 


For an alternate perspective, feel free to check out http://www.amyplumbooks.com/2011/11/lets-talk-about-insta-love/