Take Me to Your Leader

In case you haven't figured it out yet, I'm a huge nerd. A geek of the highest order. I fangirl over sci-fi and fiction and fantasize about fantasy stories. "Become companion to the Doctor" is on my bucket list. "Get a real lightsaber" is my life goal.
Okay, okay, one of those two examples is untrue.¹
Jokes aside, I love a good sci-fi story. Trans-galactic war? Why not! Extra-terrestrial sightings? Go for it! Star Wars parodies? Yes, please! Alien invasions? Well, maybe not in the way you're thinking of.
The problem with alien invasions is that most of the time, they aren't really... innovative.

"What're you talking about, Internet blogger with no credentials? We made them purple instead of grey and they're six feet tall!"

Well, yes. They are. Physically they may be different, but that's about it. Many an alien invasion looks incredibly similar. The human race gets a few warnings, a political figurehead says "no, we will not surrender!", the aliens get angry and start blowing up famous monuments, humans fight back, aliens seem to get the upper hand, humans shoot giant gun, aliens explode, humans rejoice, and rinse and repeat until we all get bored.
Whatever happened to a smart alien? Canadian poet Shane Koyczan once said that "[...] if aliens are so smart, why don't they start making their spaceships look like airplanes?" ²Why not? Why are these aliens so caught up in being obvious? In being caught? In being vanquished?
Yes, yes, the humans need to win so that this plot line sells. I understand that logic, truly, I do! What's wrong with a bit more struggle, though? A harder time winning? We should earn our victories. Humans have, time and time again, proven themselves to be resourceful and cunning and downright brilliant. Let's live up to that legacy! Instead of just finding the biggest laser possible and blowing them out of the sky, why don't we tell stories about aliens who've slipped through the cracks; about invasions that fell through our peripheral and managed to land smack-dab in the middle of power? Or leagues of extraterrestrial beings who are capable of finding our weak-spot and jabbing a needle into them? What about scientists who could make themselves great and find the chemical agent required to save the human race? The lone hero capable of standing up to this great army? The general who devises a plan so cunning and dastardly it actually works?

If you're going to write about an alien invasion, make sure it's a new breed. Make sure it's alien to us³ - something we've never seen before. If I wanted to read about the Gray Aliens and Area 51, I'd pick up another book. If I cared to watch yet another wave of bug-eyed monster come down from their frisbee-shaped spaceship, I'd find another movie. Be creative! These are aliens! Let your imagination roam free for once and create something truly spectacular. We will applaud you for it.

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1 You'll never know which one.^↩
2 This is from his spoken word poem "Atlantis". ^↩
3 Aren't I clever?^↩

Final Countdown

Five.
Four.
Three.
Two.
One.

It's the final countdown! [cue music]

This particular trope tends to make its home in thrillers.
From the bomb in the London Underground in BBC's Sherlock, to the faulty timer in Galaxy Quest, the ticking time-bomb is an easy trope. It's a simple way to build tension quite quickly. Sometimes, it's subtle and sans obvious tension and stakes, like in "Bad News" from How I Met Your Mother. The episode slowly counts down from 50 until there's nothing left but the realization that Marshall's world will never be the same.

Popular cult-classic dramedy "Chuck" had its titular character disarm many a primed-to-blow bomb. Sometimes it was with a computer virus sent from the site of a famous adult actress, or with something as simple and asinine as fruit juice.
When it's done well, it's done very well. We the audience can only hold our breaths, bite our nails, and try to keep our butts on the edges of our seats. We wince when the characters mess up and when we get to that final 5-4-3-2... We gasp. We laugh. We let out a sigh of relief. Our heroes managed to save the day yet again!

As you may have deduced by my references this time around, this particular trope works best in more visual medias. I've yet to find a short story or novel that captures the potential paradigm shift of the countdown.

Sometimes, though, it's done cheaply. Time seems to skip and freeze as our beloved directors see fit. Twenty seconds left on the clock? Pfft. More like 120. 5 minutes left? Wait, no... Hold on; the hero spent too much time staring longingly at his sidekick and now we've only got 54 seconds left!
If you're going to use a timer, please, please obey the laws of physics!¹ Furthermore, don't forget that we as the audience need to care about the stakes. If you stick a countdown in a story filled with horrible characters and a lackluster plot line, it won't matter. You can even stick four, three, or two countdowns² in there and it won't change a thing. Use the countdown well and you can strengthen your plot and the audiences' bond to the characters. Use it badly, and it won't change a thing. Be aware of how to use a countdown, and do it well. Your audience will thank you for it.

I feel the need to add a side note. Timebombs don't always have timers... Sometimes it's nothing more than a catchy beat...

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1 Unless it's Doctor Who, in which case you are free to do as you wish. Lord knows Steven Moffat does all the time. Also; if you could introduce me to Matt Smith, I'd be ever so thankful^↩
2 See what I did there?^↩

For more information, feel free to consult http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TimeBomb ^↩

The Lady Doth Protest

Let's talk about heroin heroines.

You know... female leads? What did you think I was going to talk about? Drugs? For shame!
All jokes aside, however, I find that as a female reader, I tend to have difficulty finding heroines I can relate to. Heroines I can admire, or empathize with. Ones whose actions and mental processes don't make me want to roll my eyes. This post is nothing but the tip of the iceberg when it comes to female lead faux-pas constantly made by many a YA writer. However, because I don't want to bore you all, I'm limiting myself to four characteristics that could, with a bit of pronoun changes, apply to both male and female leads.

Numero uno.
There is such a thing as "too perfect". This one certainly applies to both genders, but it comes in different shades.
This leading lady is lovely. Absolutely perfect. To quote Rudy Francisco; "When God made [her], He cussed for the very first time. He turned to an angel [...] and said 'Goddamn, I'm good'."¹ She is everything anyone could ever want. She's beautiful, even if she doesn't believe it, and men everywhere kiss the ground she walks on.
The problem with this is that it forces us, as the audience, to believe her self-worth is dependent on her physical attributes. Now, there's nothing wrong with appreciating someone's beauty, but it shouldn't be the only thing. You can make your heroine pretty, but only so long as that's not all she is.²

Numero dos.
She's got a tragic backstory.
Whatever happened to a loving family? A father who was there for his little girl? A mother who isn't willing to sell her daughter for meth? Where did family values go?
I'm all for tragic happenings if it means that your character will learn from it. When it seems like she won the Bad Luck Lottery, though, I tend to cringe.
A divorced set of parents? Sure. A sibling dying of cancer? Sure. An uncle who may or may not have been a less than savoury individual? Sure. Everything and more? Maybe not.
Show your characters some sympathy!

Numero three.
She hasn't got a backstory.
Contrary to popular belief, characters don't just pop up randomly, ready to run around and fight dragons. Well, technically they do. A good, "human" character, however, is just as, well... human as you or I. They've been through trials and tribulations. Something has happened. You don't need to spend twenty chapters telling us about the ins and outs of every little moment in her life, but keep in mind that even Bella Swan had a backstory. Was it a good one? No. At least she had one, though.
Flesh out your characters!³

Numero quatro.
She's got a brain, but oh, wait, nope... Maybe not? She claims to be intelligent but she never actually shows it. Bella from Twilight, for example, is apparently a fantastic student.⁴. Despite her tastes and apparent mental capacities, she's eager to jump off a cliff for attention. Seems like a pretty stupid idea for someone said to be so smart, don'tchathink?
Hermione Granger, however, is brilliant. "The brightest witch of [our] age!"⁵, in fact. Does she show it? Constantly. Is she any lesser of a person for it? Not at all.
Don't pretend your heroine is smart if you don't show it. Put your money where your mouth is and make heroines for those of us who prefer books over Barbies.⁶

So, let's resume, shall we?
This is the part where, if it's TL;DR, I'll sum it up and stick a bow on it.
Make your hero(ines) flawed. Give them just enough backstory to make them interesting. When you give them a characteristic, you'd best make sure you show it, too.
Don't forget we're all looking for someone we can admire. Make them realistic. They can be flawed, affable, loveable, lovely, imperfect, irritating, interesting, intelligent, naive, brave, cowardly, trusting, skeptical... It doesn't matter! Just give them some substance and make sure you build them out of more than transparent ideals and second-rate writing. Once you've got that covered, you might be en route to making a decent story.

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1 This is quoted from his "Love Poem Medley". Feel free to check it out on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpVURliPtB0

^↩
2 By that same token, don't make your male leads handsome and nothing else. He can be pretty, but make sure he's more than that. Does he have to be a member of MENSA? Not necessarily, but if he's only a pretty face, I might as well read a tabloid, right? ^↩
3 On the topic of backstories, I find it useful to quote the fantastic Stephen King; "The most important things to remember about back story are that (a) everyone has a history and (b) most of it isn’t very interesting.” Give them something to make them relatable and go from there.^↩
4 As much as I'd like to spend a full blog explaining the flaws of Twilight, I feel as if that might become dull and preachy. Instead, I'll just say that Bella Swan isn't someone you want your daughters, younger siblings, cousins or friends to emulate. Show them that there are some strong heroines out there, and some properly intelligent ones. ^↩
5 This is from book 3 of the Harry Potter series "The Prisoner of Azkaban". The page number depends entirely on which edition you're reading. ^↩
6 For male leads, the same thing applies, but with more masculine pronouns, of course.^↩

Cupid's Crosshairs

Today, we're stepping away from heroes and super-villains and taking a nice jaunt into the world of romance and Hallmark-style relationships.

There is much to be said about fiction. Sometimes, the relationships are so painfully real it's hard to read or hear. Sometimes, they're so cloyingly adorable and sweet that a trip to the dentist is required. And sometimes, they're just plain unrealistic. Sometimes, they create false standards. Sometimes, they just aren't healthy. 

Today's field trip into the land of tropes includes a visit to something I like to call "insta-love".

You know, the one where a female lead happens to be in some artsy-fartsy cafe and she looks up and sees her perfect man staring at her from across the room. Their eyes meet, fireworks explode, Cupid shoots and audiences everywhere "aww". 

I have two problems with this situation. One; artsy-fartsy cafes tend to smell funny and are as such strenuously avoided. Two; is the heroine a mind-reader? As far as I can tell, most of us aren't blessed with the ability to read someone on sight. Even Cal Lightman¹, based on real-life Dr. Paul Ekman, isn't that good. 

Oh, Bella. Why, oh why?

Instant-attraction? Sure. Instant connection over the book they both happen to be reading? Sure. But insta-love? Maybe not. It's impossible to know the subtleties of character a person has without first talking to them. It's even harder to know if two people are compatible if the most interaction they've had is a shared glance.

There's a reason the "best-friends who fall in love" trope works - it's because at the very least, they've taken the time to actually to get to know one another. Sure, it's cliched and played out and usually involves griping about how "they'll never see you like I do", but at the very least, there can be a modicrum of reality.
That's not to say you, as the creator of the next great romance, can't have your characters share glances across a crowded room. They can be attracted to one another, and maybe even trade hopeful smiles. Just be cognisant that love isn't instant. It takes work and time. Don't force your characters into relationships just for the sake of having relationships.

Your characters should be flawed, imperfect and most of all, relatable. Not every relationship will end with two souls harmonizing. Some break and fall
apart. What appears lovely at first glance might turn out to be horrendous - don't limit yourself to happily-ever-afters.
Even your characters need to learn how to be alone and to deal with heartbreak - it's what allows them to be even more real.

And most of all; realize that Cupid doesn't always have the best aim.

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1 Dr Cal Lightman is played by Tim Roth in the wonderful TV show "Lie to Me". Lightman plays a fictionalized version of Dr. Ekman, a man capable of reading micro-expressions. It's a solid piece of television, if you're looking for a new Netflix show to binge on. 


For an alternate perspective, feel free to check out http://www.amyplumbooks.com/2011/11/lets-talk-about-insta-love/ 

We Could be Heroes

A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.

-Christopher Reeve

What do Bilbo Baggins, Frodo Baggins, Katniss Everdeen, John McClane, and Arthur Dent have in common? ¹
Nothing, right? Well, yes, the first two have the same last names and share the same franchise. The first and last are both played by Martin Freeman. ²

What do they all have in common, though? If this were a Venn diagram, where would they all cross?
Answer: They're all unwilling heroes or reluctant heroes.
Please, calm down. I'll wait until you wake up from the fainting spell this revelation inevitably caused. No, you don't need to be ashamed. Truly, it's fine. Not at all embarrassing. Well, a little embarrassing, but it's fine!

If someone could explain to me what grits 
actually are, I'd be ever so thankful.

I won't bother asking about the image that comes to mind at the words "reluctant hero". Chances are, I've ruined that for you with my little bit of trivia earlier. Instead, I'll dive right into the meat and grits of the matter.

What is a reluctant hero? 
A reluctant hero tends to be a "human" one ³. Your Joe Schmoe who happens to get caught up in a whirlwind. Someone who happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Chances are, he/she is well.. reluctant. This type of hero doesn't pray for an adventure before bedtime or a war before dinner. They're happy living their humdrum lives and tend to resist any changes.


Bilbo Baggins didn't wake up one morning and decide that his day would best be spent fighting a dragon. "Start a revolution" probably wasn't on Katniss Everdeen's bucket list. Arthur Dent didn't like Thursdays, and the term "Vogon" had probably never even tried to cross his mind. 



Given half the chance, you could be a reluctant hero. Even I, who prefers to spend her Saturdays wrapped in a blanket with a good book and some tea, could be a reluctant hero. It's all about the execution. 

A reluctant hero shouldn't go from zero to a hundred in two seconds. They're meant to be reluctant.
A reluctant hero shouldn't get all the lucky breaks. They can't win the lottery and find the magical sword that will, with one badly aimed swing, slay the evil dragon. 
A reluctant hero shouldn't drown in angst. Yes, we understand they don't want to be there, but that dismay shouldn't define them.⁴

Don't force your newest hero to be great off the bat. Instead, lead them to greatness. Carry your audience along on this journey and let them learn alongside your hero. 
And again; "let your character breathe". 

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1 In order; The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, The Hunger Games, Die Hard, and the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy


2 This was not intentional.

3 Feel free to play around with species, here. You needn't be limited by the term "human". This is only meant to imply relatable characteristics, and does not necessarily apply to Predator-like creatures.


4 For more information on this subject, feel free to visit http://referenceforwriters.tumblr.com/post/52649873996/on-writing-heroes and http://crimsonleague.com/2013/07/21/how-to-craft-a-reluctant-hero-for-any-genre-what-to-watch-out-for/